The Trouble With Fish
by Jenefur
Summary: "All of them had a fish. All of them, except..." Rin contemplates fish and friendship.


He doesn't notice them at first.

When he arrives at Makoto's house early that morning with the rest of the guys, he doesn't see them. They weren't something he was looking for and new additions to the interior of the Tachibana residence since his absence hadn't been something he would have noticed.

When they're leaving that afternoon to head down to the beach, however, he does see them.

Makoto and Rei are already outside and he can hear Rei talking about how he needs to change the trajectory of his swim stroke to compensate for the waves as Makoto laughs patiently next to him.

As Rin puts on his shoes and makes his way to head out next to them, they catch his eye. Sitting on a table next to the entryway is a fish tank containing four small fish.

They're beautiful fish, healthy, and Rin can see, as he peers closer at them, that they are very well taken care of. As he leans in, he can hear the light hum of the filter as the fish swim happily in their tank.

"These are nice fish", he comments to Nagisa, who has come to stand behind him. Nagisa is currently struggling to pull a hoodie over the top of his head as he looks out to where Makoto and Rei are standing.

"Yeah," Nagisa says, finally succeeding to pulling the hoodie down, hair sticking out wildly from the top of his head. He sounds out of breath, as if he had just come back from running instead of from the living area they'd all been sitting in.

"We got them at the Squid Festival. There's one for each of us!" Nagisa says before he yells "Rei-chan!" loudly and bounds out the door.

Rin can hear them all outside now, Nagisa and Rei already bickering about something while Makoto tries to calmly mediate the situation.

Rin turns back to the fish, watching as they idly cruise through the water.

'_There's one for each of us,'_ Nagisa had said.

He looks at the fish and names them as they float into his view.

Rei. Nagisa. Makoto. Haru.

Four fish for four boys.

_There's one for each of us._

All of them had a fish. All of them, except…

'It's not intentional,' Rin thinks as he pulls away from the tank, 'It's not on purpose. Nagisa is as subtle as a brick so he didn't say it to be backhanded. The Squid Festival was a long time ago, you weren't even friends then. So there's no reason why you should be…"

Yet, even with this in mind, Rin can't help the familiar sense of bitterness that wells up in his chest. It is his fault that he doesn't have a fish in the tank. He knows that. And it doesn't really matter anyway, they're just _fish_, they don't _mean_ anything, but the bitterness and twinge of regret still rise up in him.

Suddenly, he doesn't feel like swimming anymore.

"Rin", he hears behind him as he pulls his view away from the tank. Haru is standing there, waiting for him the join the others outside.

"I..uh, yeah" Rin says as he turns back to the fish tank. There are questions and phrases on the tip of his tongue that he wants to voice out.

_There are only four fish in this tank. I know it was a long time ago but…I thought everything was ok, I thought we were fine. Were friends right? So why? Why is it like this?_

_Why isn't there a fish for me?_

He looks away from the fish and sees Haru staring at him, a slightly confused expression on his face.

He watches as Haru's gaze shifts to the fish tank and there's an air of recognition in his look that Rin doesn't want to see.

"Let's go!" Rin says brightly as he moves away from the fish tank towards to the door, sending Haru a smile.

The smile feels tight on his face.

* * *

They go to the beach and it's fun. It is.

All of them are together and their laughing and having water fights and swimming to their hearts content.

And everything is fine, because they're all having fun together.

And yet, with every passing laugh or jostle or tug into the water, Rin can't help but feel that something isn't right.

Haru stays closer to him them usual at the beach, and keeps looking at him likes he's going to break at any moment.

But he's not, he won't, because he's having fun. He is.

But between the laughter, his mind goes back to the tank at Makoto's house and dull, heavily feeling in his chest hasn't left him.

Four fish for four boys_. There's one for each of us. _

And Rin, despite all the fun he is having, feels as though he doesn't belong here.

_Being with them just…doesn't feel right._

* * *

It's next week and Rin is walking up the steps to Haru's house.

Since the end of the last tournament, he and Haru had taken up training together once a week. They usually practice at Samezuka, but today Haru was insistent that they do their training at the beach. And while Rin may be pushy, Haru is _stubborn_, and Rin doesn't have it in him to argue against him.

"I'm coming in!" he says loudly as he opens the front door to Haru's house and makes his way in.

He's not standing in the hallway to greet him like he was expecting, so Rin makes him way into the living area.

When he gets there, Haru's not there either, so he yells out "Haru!" to get his attention.

Before he leaves the room, though, a sight catches his eye.

Sitting on the cabinet, next to the trophy they had all won together in the relay when they were children, is a fish tank, with one singular red fish swimming in its space.

He edges forward and notices the tank is a lot bigger than the one at Makoto's house, with more greenery. There is also a small toy shark fin peeking out of the bottom of the pebbles.

"You ready?" Rin hears, as he jolts in surprise. Haru is standing behind him with an expectant look on his face.

"The fish...?" Rin questions lightly, looking up at Haru's face.

Haru's gaze moves towards the fish tank, watching the red fish swim happily in circles.

"Oh." Is all he says as he makes his way to stand next to Rin.

They stand there for a few moments, idly watching the fish move around in its tank.

"It's name is Rin." Haru says quietly beside him. He says it like its obvious. Like it's the most obvious thing in world. Of course he would have a red fish in his house. Of course he would name it Rin. He says it like its normal, like its natural, like having a fish named anything else would be _wrong._

And Rin feels it, feels _that, _as the dark twinges in his chest leave him and his whole body is filled to the brim with an intense sense of _joy._

"Haru!" Rin says, his voice hitching up at the end as he turns and wraps his arms around the other boy's shoulder, a smile taking over his face.

"O-oi!" He hears Haru say, as he struggles and pushes against his grip, but Rin doesn't care, just holds tighter, because this boy-this stupid, water-crazy, _incredible _boy- went out of his way and bought a fish, bought a fish _just for him_, and just the thought of that leaves Rin's body feeling so warm.

"Haru, you make me so happy," Rin says, smile still stretching out over his lips. He feels Haru tense up a little, so he grips one more time, before pulling away.

"Come on!" Rin says pulling back and heading towards the hallway. He turns and he sees Haru looking at him, his eyes glimmering with something he doesn't quite recognize.

"Let's go!" Rin exclaims, head motioning towards the door, smile still stretched across his mouth.

Haru stands there for a moment, before he moves forward, a small smile gracing his face as he says, "Yeah."

"I bet I can beat you to the beach."

"No chance."

"Haaah? You think practicing for one tournament means you can out run me now?"

"I don't think. I know."

"Oh so cocky! Ok! Let's make it interesting. Loser buys dinner for the rest of the week."

"I want mackerel."

"Haru, you can't…Oi! I didn't say you could start running yet!"

Rin ends up losing against Haru, making it the edge of the water just as Haru dives in. He takes Haru to the mart later that day and buys him enough mackerel to last him a month.

It's more than he expected to buy, but, thinking back to the small red fish swimming in Haru's house, in Haru's house _alone, _he finds that he doesn't mind.

* * *

A/N: Just a quick thing to keep me going since Free! isn't on anymore. If they don't give Rin a symbolic fish of friendship in the second season, I am going to be so upset. If you find any mistakes, please let me know!


End file.
